Erin is almost 2 and she has Acute Myeloid Leukemia M7. Even though she's here in the hosptial she's still a two year old toddler with a two year old toddler way of thinking. Sometimes she's so sweet and patient, but other times she a tantrum thrower. We've decided to give her an opinion whenever we can. Like, today they let her pick which arm they put the blood pressure cuff on. I let her pick her movies we watch, I let her open the DVDs and get the disk for me, I let her push "play" on the remote. The opposite also happens, we have to hold her down to put in her eye drops and to give her oral medication.
I am trying to be as patient as I can possiblly be with her. It's hard when she yells "stop it" to me or the nurses. It breaks my heart to see her sobbing when something hurts. We will pretty much be confined to our hospital room for the next 3-4 weeks. We are doing a lot of movie watching. Aunt Diana has been getting us DVDs from the SLC Library. The hospital has a ton of movies, but they are geared mostly towards ages 4 and up. We do a lot of coloring, being silly with stuffed animals, doing puzzles, and reading books. I hope that when we get done with this that we are still good little buddies.
Last night I read something about "breaking the news to your child that they have cancer." I realized that I've never really said anything to Erin about her having cancer. Of course, she's very young, but she's also very smart. So last night when things were quiet I told her that her body was very sick. I asked her if she knew that too. She nodded her head. I told her that Heavenly Father would help her feel better. I asked her if she believed that and she nodded her head "yes" again. I really think that she understood our little conversation, she knows what's going on.
This morning I read 3 Nephi 17. What a blessing to be on that chapter in my reading in this particular time of my life. Our Savior has such a beautiful love for little children.
Yestersday I went to the Parent Resource Center and they gave me a 6 month membership to the Jewish Community Center where me and my family can swim, take workout classes, run on the track, play basketball, tennis, etc. Today I went to running while Erin was sleeping. It felt so good to do something physical!
The Resident just came in and told me that Erin's platelet count is 18. A normal person is 150, so now she's going to get a transfusion. I hope you're all out donating blood today! I need to do it myself!
Tags: "Childhood Acute Myeloid Leukemia" "AML" "Leukemia" "M7" "Acute Megakaryocytic Leukemia"
You will be in our prayers. I'm so glad you are getting out and doing things for yourself spiritually, emotional and physically because then you will have something to give your sweet daughter. You are amazing!
ReplyDeleteIt can be so difficult to be a mother. We need to do what is best for our children and sometimes that means pain now, for a greater purpose. And yet we need to be compassionate and understanding. May you have the strength and wisdom to find that balance.
ReplyDeleteYou are so resourceful and creative! I doubt i would respond so patiently in a similar situation. Well done!
ReplyDeleteCassie used to lifeguard at the Jewish Community Center.
Your little conversation with Erin made me cry. We're still praying for her (and you and Jon and kids).
ReplyDeleteYou are such a wonderful, beautiful, nurturing mother!! I hope I can be like you one day! And what a beautiful family...you are so blessed. I know the Lord will support you through this trial.
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